Source: http://honest2betsy.blogspot.com/2011/03/open-letter-to-hers-foundation-on.html
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Linkworthy
Things I would write about if I only had the time… Traffic deaths are at a stunning 60-year low. Can we blame the lawyers a little? The New England Journal of Medicine on medical malpractice liability “reform;” A New York appellate court upholds a multi-million dollar verdict for a man on the tracks that was [...]
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NewYorkPersonalInjuryLawBlog/~3/Hf8ZphiT2aI/linkworthy-52.html
The magic that is a child (this is not a year-end recap)
Every morning I am awoken by Hawk climbing into bed with me; my mattress is on the floor and he delights in the ease with which he can snuggle down next to me. Today was no different.
Yet, somehow, today is different. Just a little.
It's my 5 year anniversary.
I feel some sadness about this, though it's more like I feel a kind of heavy pressure regarding its presence rather than any real emotion about it. Maybe it's more accurate to say, I think I feel some sadness about today.
Hawk rustled under the covers and my eyes blinked open to see the sunlight streaming in over the back of his spiky bedhead. His little shoulder rising and falling with his breath accompanied by a slight motion from rubbing his blankie between his thumb and forefinger.
Then he rolled over and we were nose to nose looking deeply into each other's eyes. His dark brown lashes blurred into white tips as they caught the soft light and his cobalt blue irises reflected me back like a tiny, tiny mirror. Everything else in the universe ceased to exist as I stared at myself in his eyes. He lifted his hand, placed it on my face gently and said, "It is a good day."
The last five weeks have been incredible; such a tangle of every emotion possible. I am happier than I've been in years, yet I am also sad; I'm angry, I'm at peace; I hurt, I rejoice. The death of my marriage has conjured up the ghosts from my father's and Levi's deaths and I have re-experienced that pain all over again, as well. Apparently, despite my grief over these things being so vastly different, they're still all in a "grief file" in my brain and when I pull out one, I revisit the others whether I want to or not.
Grief aside, life is pretty fucking ok.
Rooster and I are doing well. We have our moments of locked horns, but just as in our marriage our separation and road to divorce is full of decorum and respect. We're like little barnyard goats, not bighorn sheep. I couldn't ask for a better man in my life than him to share this with -- is it weird to say I wouldn't want to divorce anyone else but him?? I think you get the point: his kind, gentle intelligence is serving us now just as it did when we were working to stay together.
My friends have been supportive and caring; gently reaching out, but never crowding me. I've had some incredibly low moments this month and if it weren't for the steady trickle of concern from far and wide my pain surely would have run away with me. Thank you to all of you. I cannot imagine my life without you.
Tuesday, January 4th, Hawk starts day care. Full time. I got him enrolled in an amazing school which is centered around child-led play. Seventy-five children, aged 18 months to 5 years, run amok playing with potions, piles of sand, old tires, and the ugliest castoff toys I've ever seen which somehow magically turn into the shiniest, most spectacularly special toys when I use the eyes of my youth.
A lot has been going on, yes... yet, I haven't been dreading today as you might think. I believe in regular days and their mundane power and try not to give importance to arbitrary dates (with the singular exception of Hawk's birthday and those days which those I love find important). I'm having some of my dearest friends over tonight, people who were at my wedding 5 years ago, and Rooster has asked to join us. Of course I said he was more than welcome.
So I will be ringing in the New Year much the same as I did five years ago: with hope, with expectation, with love and friends surrounding me. The biggest difference now is that everyday I have a small, cherubic face to remind me what a good day it is today lest I forget.
And as his early morning words faded into the space over our heads comfortably cradled in my down pillows he moved his hand to rub my arm. He took a small breath and added to his assertion about today's goodness, "You are so precious."
Indeed, I thought, but it's more like lucky. I am so, so lucky.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ThisIsWorthwhile/~3/DwlB6Bhzrjk/magic-that-is-child.html
Linkworthy
Things I would write about if I only had the time… Traffic deaths are at a stunning 60-year low. Can we blame the lawyers a little? The New England Journal of Medicine on medical malpractice liability “reform;” A New York appellate court upholds a multi-million dollar verdict for a man on the tracks that was [...]
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NewYorkPersonalInjuryLawBlog/~3/Hf8ZphiT2aI/linkworthy-52.html
The magic that is a child (this is not a year-end recap)
Every morning I am awoken by Hawk climbing into bed with me; my mattress is on the floor and he delights in the ease with which he can snuggle down next to me. Today was no different.
Yet, somehow, today is different. Just a little.
It's my 5 year anniversary.
I feel some sadness about this, though it's more like I feel a kind of heavy pressure regarding its presence rather than any real emotion about it. Maybe it's more accurate to say, I think I feel some sadness about today.
Hawk rustled under the covers and my eyes blinked open to see the sunlight streaming in over the back of his spiky bedhead. His little shoulder rising and falling with his breath accompanied by a slight motion from rubbing his blankie between his thumb and forefinger.
Then he rolled over and we were nose to nose looking deeply into each other's eyes. His dark brown lashes blurred into white tips as they caught the soft light and his cobalt blue irises reflected me back like a tiny, tiny mirror. Everything else in the universe ceased to exist as I stared at myself in his eyes. He lifted his hand, placed it on my face gently and said, "It is a good day."
The last five weeks have been incredible; such a tangle of every emotion possible. I am happier than I've been in years, yet I am also sad; I'm angry, I'm at peace; I hurt, I rejoice. The death of my marriage has conjured up the ghosts from my father's and Levi's deaths and I have re-experienced that pain all over again, as well. Apparently, despite my grief over these things being so vastly different, they're still all in a "grief file" in my brain and when I pull out one, I revisit the others whether I want to or not.
Grief aside, life is pretty fucking ok.
Rooster and I are doing well. We have our moments of locked horns, but just as in our marriage our separation and road to divorce is full of decorum and respect. We're like little barnyard goats, not bighorn sheep. I couldn't ask for a better man in my life than him to share this with -- is it weird to say I wouldn't want to divorce anyone else but him?? I think you get the point: his kind, gentle intelligence is serving us now just as it did when we were working to stay together.
My friends have been supportive and caring; gently reaching out, but never crowding me. I've had some incredibly low moments this month and if it weren't for the steady trickle of concern from far and wide my pain surely would have run away with me. Thank you to all of you. I cannot imagine my life without you.
Tuesday, January 4th, Hawk starts day care. Full time. I got him enrolled in an amazing school which is centered around child-led play. Seventy-five children, aged 18 months to 5 years, run amok playing with potions, piles of sand, old tires, and the ugliest castoff toys I've ever seen which somehow magically turn into the shiniest, most spectacularly special toys when I use the eyes of my youth.
A lot has been going on, yes... yet, I haven't been dreading today as you might think. I believe in regular days and their mundane power and try not to give importance to arbitrary dates (with the singular exception of Hawk's birthday and those days which those I love find important). I'm having some of my dearest friends over tonight, people who were at my wedding 5 years ago, and Rooster has asked to join us. Of course I said he was more than welcome.
So I will be ringing in the New Year much the same as I did five years ago: with hope, with expectation, with love and friends surrounding me. The biggest difference now is that everyday I have a small, cherubic face to remind me what a good day it is today lest I forget.
And as his early morning words faded into the space over our heads comfortably cradled in my down pillows he moved his hand to rub my arm. He took a small breath and added to his assertion about today's goodness, "You are so precious."
Indeed, I thought, but it's more like lucky. I am so, so lucky.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ThisIsWorthwhile/~3/DwlB6Bhzrjk/magic-that-is-child.html
Monday, May 30, 2011
'Morris the Mankiest Monster' and 'Shark in the Dark' - reviews for World Book Day.
Continuing the celebration of all things book-ish for World Book Day on Thursday, here are two more excellent children's books, both of which have been nominated for the 2011 Kate Greenaway Medal. Previous winners of this award include: Emily Gravett for 'Wolves' and also for 'Little Mouse's Big Book of Fears' and Mini Grey for 'The Adventures of the Dish and the Spoon.' This year's shortlist will be announced on 1st April.
'Shark in the Dark' by Nick Sharratt is a follow up to the previous book 'Shark in the Park'. Nick Sharratt is also behind the excellent 'Caveman Dave' and 'Smart Aunties' as well as tonnes of other books. 'Shark in the Dark' is an excellent book which actually glows in the dark - sure to intrigue any young reader for a start. As with all Nick Sharratt's book, the language and rhyming patterns are superb and really engage young readers. We loved this - especially the evil looking shark!
'Morris the Mankiest Monster' (pictured above) by Giles Andreae and Sarah McIntyre is 'the most revolting children's book of the year'. Morris is disgusting - absolutely disgusting. I read this to a group of 5 year olds today and they absolutely loved it - they were hilarious 'eeuurrgghhing' and 'yukking' at his revolting-ness! Giles Andreae is the man behind 'Purple Ronnie' and his fabulous, comedy writing shines through in this book. Our favourite line is, "His shoes are all slurpy and squelchy inside and potatoes grow out of his pants." Guaranteed to make any young child giggle - and childish adults too!
Enjoy - and don't forget to check out yesterday's book reviews with a chance to win a copy of either.
More tomorrow.
Source: http://hotcrossmum.blogspot.com/2011/02/morris-mankiest-monster-and-shark-in.html
Alabama Tornado Victims (And Free Legal Help)
The killing of Osama bin Laden has overshadowed all other news. But that is to the detriment of Alabama tornado victims that were hit just days before, when over 300 people died. The search for survivors continues. And there is free legal help available: Jon Lewis from Birmingham has the details. The word should be [...]
Essential Oil Remedies for Children: The Basics
I am blessed with an amazing acupuncturist (Sage Norbury of Summit Acupuncture Services) who is also trained in the art of essential oils. I recently booked Sage to lead an adult class for our learning cooperative. She did a fantastic presentation on essential oils for children – she discussed everything from bonding to tonsillitis. I’m [...]
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CodeNameMama/~3/2hB2BIDxbU0/
Ideas for Homemade Time Capsules for Baby?s First Birthday
Before Kieran’s first birthday, Tom and I were intent on creating a time capsule for Kieran to open when he came of age. We finally kicked it into high gear sometime after Kieran turned two years old.1 Because it took us some time to come up with decent ideas for a time capsule, I gathered [...]
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/CodeNameMama/~3/amjQ6Oo51B0/
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Drop off, pick up, dust myself off
This last image is the one I lead with yesterday. It's the moment that Hawk realizes something is different. Mommy and Daddy are gone. He is on his own.
You might be surprised to know that I didn't cry. Somewhere between filling his cubby with his nap time things and dropping off his lunch then walking to the adjoining playground space I did crack. Just a little.
I sucked in through my teeth, turned my back on Rooster who was beside me, and stared at the bare limbs of a small tree, the bright gray sky a bare palette behind. I swallowed hard and thought, "You can do this," and walked back to my boy whose excited hopping was causing his hand-me-down pants to slip.
I rolled over his waistband and let him in through the gate. We said hi to the teachers we'd met over the previous weeks and the director came to talk to us to reassure us that if Hawk was distressed when we left they would be there for him.
Naturally Hawk was already playing with the tractors he so loves and didn't think anything was amiss. I called him over to give him a hug and a kiss and he did so sweetly. Then Daddy.
Then we left. And, well, you all know the rest.
What you don't know is how barren I felt as I drove away. How lost.
I went to a coffee shop to kill some time before an appointment, came home, went to another appointment, then to another coffee shop; and listed through the hours. Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick fucking tock.
The timing is right for this, divorce or no divorce, but I wasn't banking on having every other aspect of my entire life also different when my baby moved on to the next stage of his development. And yesterday marked the dumping of the last vestige of my old life.
It is irrevocably gone.
All of it.
Every single piece.
In four weeks my entire life has been heaved over my head and thrown.
I couldn't wait to go pick him up at 5. I missed his little face and energy and the way he likes to say, "I do love you, Mommy." It was like I had been lost at sea all day and he was my lighthouse. My 3 foot tall, gassy, funny, tempestuous, darling, inquisitive, demanding, loving little lighthouse.
It's a testament to something -- the universe, my parenting, Hawk, I don't know -- that when I called the school at 2 to check in the director told me that Hawk had only cried those couple of minutes and fell right into step with the other children, even calling him over to play with the tractors. He got his own lunch, picked a place to eat, and fell asleep immediately at nap time.
He felt safe there away from me and without me, I thought. The boy is securely attached. I'm doing my job right.
And when I finally arrived at the playground he was standing feet from the gate looking away. I called to him and he ran into my arms, an enormous grin splitting his face. He was sopping wet from his butt down, his shoes muddy. The cuffs of his shirt were stained and his hands were filthy. He looked amazing.
"You came back!!" he shouted gleefully and squeezed my neck tighter.
"Of course I did, baby, Mama will always come back." I stood up and said, "Let's go get your things. It's time to go."
"Ok!" he replied and he ran off like he actually knew what he was doing. A little boy, not a baby. He took me to a back gate and then a teacher met us and set up his outside cubby. He'd picked a green cover and a silver pen with which to have his name written. I've never seen him looking more proud of himself. He had a cubby! She explained that it would hold outside things. He nodded and sprinted off around the corner. I followed.
Little elfin picnic tables were scattered about under a canopy. "Where did you sit for lunch, baby?"
"Right here!" he announced with a pat to a teeny little bench.
He expertly opened the back door to the house and we gathered his things; his backpack from the (elfin) kitchen table, his blankie from his indoor cubby. He was so fucking happy to be running around in his new place with his mommy. I could just feel it radiating from him.
I'd brought some spare pants for him knowing they'd let the kids play in the mud and rain and I peeled off his sodden ones and wrapped him in a warm blanket in his car seat. I took pictures of his hands. Proof of his glorious first day at school. My heart was at once broken and soaring.
Traffic was bad and we chatted for a while. He had played with Kaylie and Andrew and a boy whose name he couldn't remember, but had worn a red shirt. He had also, "Pwayed and pwayed and pwayed." Then we sat in silence.
"Do you want the radio on?"
"No."
"Do you want to talk about your day some more?"
"No."
"Do you want to just chill for a while?"
"Yes. And I'm hungry. I want food. And I want to go back and pway some more."
It's true that I am alone in all of this, but I at least have the great pleasure of navigating all of it with him under my wing. My sweet, sweet baby Hawk.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ThisIsWorthwhile/~3/At6doNWuKnc/drop-off-pick-up-dust-myself-off.html
Weekend Links
Explore Your City This Summer: Year of the Staycation :: The Happy Housewife How to Encourage Your Child to be Creative, Even When You are NOT :: Not Just Cute Paper Plate Emotion Masks :: No Time For Flashcards Share Your Strawberry Ideas :: Balancing Beauty and Bedlam I’ve Got Twins! :: Nesting Place I’m [...]
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� 2008-2011 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplelivingmedia.com to let us know. Thanks.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/simplemom/~3/cuWpJjNIA3A/
When Patti Smith is worried, you should be worried
Image credit – photo of Patti Smith with her children, by Annie Leibovitz. I really love my kids, I like having them around me. They can drive you nuts and they?re such a responsibility but it?s like a movie you can never see again. You watch it as it?s happening and you think it?s always [...]
Source: http://bluemilk.wordpress.com/2011/05/22/when-patti-smith-is-worried-you-should-be-worried/
Weekend Giveaway: AboutOne and Keepsy
Today I’ve got a great giveaway for you, and it’s pretty different than the previous AboutOne giveaways we’ve had this year! They’re partnering with Keepsy, who wants to give you something, too. To jog your memory, here’s what AboutOne does: AboutOne is an online productivity tool for home managers. It provides one place to manage [...]
CURRENT SPONSORS:
- Oak Meadow - discover the joy of learning at home.
- Plan to Eat - meal planning made simple.
- Horizon Structures - pre-built chicken coops.
- Mineral Fusion - genuinely natural & soothing for your skin.
- AboutOne - one place to manage household information.
� 2008-2011 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplelivingmedia.com to let us know. Thanks.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/simplemom/~3/_2FZXAJAU-o/
Keeping Blog Spam At Bay (Akismet and WordPress)
Over at Simple Justice, Scott Greenfield had a nice little piece about a spammer claiming to go by the name of Tom Sanders. “Tom,” it seems, wants Greenfield to pay him money to leave blog comment spam. Greenfield — noting that he got 500 comment spams overnight — has some fun with this pathetic excuse [...]
Saturday, May 28, 2011
The magic that is a child (this is not a year-end recap)
Every morning I am awoken by Hawk climbing into bed with me; my mattress is on the floor and he delights in the ease with which he can snuggle down next to me. Today was no different.
Yet, somehow, today is different. Just a little.
It's my 5 year anniversary.
I feel some sadness about this, though it's more like I feel a kind of heavy pressure regarding its presence rather than any real emotion about it. Maybe it's more accurate to say, I think I feel some sadness about today.
Hawk rustled under the covers and my eyes blinked open to see the sunlight streaming in over the back of his spiky bedhead. His little shoulder rising and falling with his breath accompanied by a slight motion from rubbing his blankie between his thumb and forefinger.
Then he rolled over and we were nose to nose looking deeply into each other's eyes. His dark brown lashes blurred into white tips as they caught the soft light and his cobalt blue irises reflected me back like a tiny, tiny mirror. Everything else in the universe ceased to exist as I stared at myself in his eyes. He lifted his hand, placed it on my face gently and said, "It is a good day."
The last five weeks have been incredible; such a tangle of every emotion possible. I am happier than I've been in years, yet I am also sad; I'm angry, I'm at peace; I hurt, I rejoice. The death of my marriage has conjured up the ghosts from my father's and Levi's deaths and I have re-experienced that pain all over again, as well. Apparently, despite my grief over these things being so vastly different, they're still all in a "grief file" in my brain and when I pull out one, I revisit the others whether I want to or not.
Grief aside, life is pretty fucking ok.
Rooster and I are doing well. We have our moments of locked horns, but just as in our marriage our separation and road to divorce is full of decorum and respect. We're like little barnyard goats, not bighorn sheep. I couldn't ask for a better man in my life than him to share this with -- is it weird to say I wouldn't want to divorce anyone else but him?? I think you get the point: his kind, gentle intelligence is serving us now just as it did when we were working to stay together.
My friends have been supportive and caring; gently reaching out, but never crowding me. I've had some incredibly low moments this month and if it weren't for the steady trickle of concern from far and wide my pain surely would have run away with me. Thank you to all of you. I cannot imagine my life without you.
Tuesday, January 4th, Hawk starts day care. Full time. I got him enrolled in an amazing school which is centered around child-led play. Seventy-five children, aged 18 months to 5 years, run amok playing with potions, piles of sand, old tires, and the ugliest castoff toys I've ever seen which somehow magically turn into the shiniest, most spectacularly special toys when I use the eyes of my youth.
A lot has been going on, yes... yet, I haven't been dreading today as you might think. I believe in regular days and their mundane power and try not to give importance to arbitrary dates (with the singular exception of Hawk's birthday and those days which those I love find important). I'm having some of my dearest friends over tonight, people who were at my wedding 5 years ago, and Rooster has asked to join us. Of course I said he was more than welcome.
So I will be ringing in the New Year much the same as I did five years ago: with hope, with expectation, with love and friends surrounding me. The biggest difference now is that everyday I have a small, cherubic face to remind me what a good day it is today lest I forget.
And as his early morning words faded into the space over our heads comfortably cradled in my down pillows he moved his hand to rub my arm. He took a small breath and added to his assertion about today's goodness, "You are so precious."
Indeed, I thought, but it's more like lucky. I am so, so lucky.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ThisIsWorthwhile/~3/DwlB6Bhzrjk/magic-that-is-child.html
Enjoy World Book Day with Priddy Books
To celebrate World Book Day (today), I have been reviewing some excellent children's books on the blog this week. I'm also running a competition to give away a copy of two of the books - check it out; winners will be announced tomorrow (Friday).
For my final book-ish post, I would like to highlight the very excellent Priddy Books who, as well as celebrating World Book Day are also celebrating their 10th birthday this Spring.
I'm sure many of you have one of Priddy Book's excellent titles among the bookshelves at home - from their Touch and Feel books for very young readers to their fantastic sticker books and activity books to first reference books, there really is something for everyone.
We were very lucky to be sent the set of sticker and colouring books pictured below. These are small, A5 size, very slim books which fit easily into a bag and will keep your children occupied anywhere you need them to be occupied! The themes of the books in this set include: Trucks, Baby Animals and The World. A sticker book each kept my two boys occupied for the entire flight from Dublin to Leeds. I was thanking Priddy Books several times as I drank my much needed cup of coffee in peace!
Whether you have come across Priddy Books already, or are looking for great ideas for encouraging your children to read, and interact with books, there can be few websites better worth exploring.
And if you ever needed an idea for an easter gift, which wasn't chocolate.......
Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.
Source: http://hotcrossmum.blogspot.com/2011/03/enjoy-world-book-day-with-priddy-books.html
'cos we are living, in a digital world....
...and I am not a digital girl!
I'm back on the Technological Progression bandwagon I'm afraid. More kicking and screaming and going rigid and refusing to be strapped into the car seat of digital technology.
I am, this time, fretting about a picture I saw in my local newspaper which showed a class of Junior Infants (that's five-year-olds), proudly writing their letters on their brand new iPads. I saw the picture and didn't think, "Wow, that's amazing. How forward-thinking." I thought, "Oh my god, that's awful." It was as jarring as looking at a picture of a three-year-old beauty pageant. "Whatever happened to the good old days of copy books and a pencil?" I remonstrated to my husband (as I pulled down the blackout blinds, darned my socks and listened to Gracie Fields on the radio).
I know I sound massively old-fashioned and I probably know that it is inevitable that our children will be taught interactively. I also know that it's good for the trees, but I am still more than a bit uncomfortable at the thought of my children having their first school experience, and learning how to write and read (and draw quite probably) on an iPad. Can't we hold off until they're a bit older? Like, eighteen?
As a family who have held off on the Wii and the DS (and our children are under the age of six so I don?t think that?s a particularly radical decision), I just feel afraid that our children will know nothing other than to stare at a screen for every aspect of their life. They will read ebooks, play interactive sports on the TV, Skype their nana, waste countless years of their lives with some Angry Birds. Maybe I was naively hoping that school would be the final, digital frontier.
Looks like I was wrong.
What do you think? Are iPads in the classroom an excellent idea or just an unavoidable sign of the times you'd rather live without?
Source: http://hotcrossmum.blogspot.com/2011/03/cos-we-are-living-in-digital-world.html
Today, I left him at daycare
Hawk is in yellow.
This is the moment he realizes we're gone; before the tears and sobbing, after the elation of being there with his beloved "Scoops."
Rooster bore the brunt of his three-year-old terror of being left behind since his car was parked close to where Hawk was standing.
I walked stiffly to my car, out of sight, willing the sounds of sobs out of my ears and my own out of my throat. I stood morosely by my car and waited as Rooster rolled by.
He rolled down the window, his face splotchy, his eyes red, "Yeah, that sucked."
"Yep," I said. "It'll be ok."
He nodded and drove off.
I climbed in my car and watched as a teacher came to comfort Hawk. He stood there as she offered gentle consolation for 2, maybe 3 minutes. Then he was out of my line of sight.
I drove forward so as to turn around and leave and I could see he is back at the tractors; hunched over diligently scooping away.
I'm gonna be ok.
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ThisIsWorthwhile/~3/s6wJvvOShs8/today-i-left-him-at-daycare.html
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